Are you finding yourself trapped in self-talk emphasizing all that is not possible when the universe is constantly sending you messages on how you can escape the negativity trap and live a life of purpose and meaning?
The story goes that a village in the Italian Alps was hit by floodwaters with all the locals quickly heeding warnings from rescue workers to leave in buses for shelters on higher ground. All but one man refused to leave. Eventually, the rescue workers came by in speed boats with the waters rising rapidly. Again the villager refused to leave saying: “God will look after me.”
Failing to get the message
As the waters rose the villager had to eventually climb onto his rooftop. A rescue helicopter swooped low offering help. Again the villager refused help: “I’m staying. I’m putting my trust in God to help me.”
The inevitable happened. The man drowned. Reaching heaven’s gate, he accused God of ignoring his prayers. “What do you mean?” God responded kindly. “First I sent buses to the village to rescue everyone, then I sent the rescue workers in speed boats and finally I sent the helicopter and you still refused to get the message.”
When trapped in a spiral of negativity or in the sadness of that which once was and is no more, you will never perceive the whispers of the universe, offering you new opportunities in the ever-turning cyclical spiral of life.
The message from the universe could come in a casual word dropped by a passenger in a train, an image on a billboard or in a book full of wisdom that puts you on a completely different trajectory.
The underlying fear and trauma
If you have a partner, a dear friend or a family member who responds with a “no” to everything you are suggesting, then you might consider the following. There might be underlying fears and trauma for their negativity. They might be in the process of transmuting these fears and trauma by taking a necessary painful walk over the hot coals.
They might respond with “no” because they are stressed out and feeling emotionally drained. You will see with great clarity an opportunity for them, while they are not seeing it at all, making you angry for wasting your time with them. You can only react with patient communication and active listening in breaking down the barrier.
Stepping out of the comfort zone
Stepping out of the comfort zone takes courage. Most people would rather suffer all their life in quiet misery than make the change that could completely transform their life. One of the major reasons why people are risk-averse is that they fear the shame of failure and loss if things go wrong. Staying in the comfort zone provides a certain sense of predictability and control. Meanhwhile, the mental imposter feeds low self-esteem and lack of self-confidence with negative self-talk: “That’s impossible. I’ll never manage that. I can’t do that. I don’t have the skills, money, and talent that others have.”
The seeds of low self-esteem are often sown in early childhood with the constant criticism from parents, siblings, teachers and peer groups far outweighing tangible and positive reinforcement. Especially those individuals who are different or highly talented will feel the pressure to conform to the lowest common denominator of the tribe.
Meanwhile opportunity has been waiting all along at the other end of the smokescreen. Overcoming the fear of walking an unknown path involves acknowledging these fears, taking it one step at a time, building self-confidence by acknowledging those steps, and practicing self-compassion. The first steps are a painful walk in leaving well-known territory, and the “protection” of the tribe
But ultimately the walk into authenticity is highly rewarding. By facing and embracing new challenges consciousness and personal growth are elevated. You increase your resilience by facing all the storms of life.
There is no satisfaction greater than the realisation that the universe is sculpturing you into the person you were always meant to be.
Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker
P.S. If you’ve found this article of interest you might want to read more in my books. “The Turning of the Circle: Embracing Nature’s Wisdom for Purposeful Living” has just been published. You might also find my other books “Deep Walking for Body, Mind and Soul” and “Walking on Edge: A Pilgrimage to Santiago” of interest – available where all good books are sold.
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