Why most New Year resolutions suck

Life so often becomes predictable in the way we function and go on automatic. We have the same patterns, thoughts and feelings. We take the same route to work at  the same time each day. We have the same conversations and relational interactions. We plan an agenda for the week, the month the year and the day we retire.

One of the many things the past year has taught us how unpredictable life can be. It is in those moments of crisis when we are hurled onto the ground, when the familiar map disappears, when we are forced out of familiar territory that  we can truly take a look inside. It is during these moments that elevation of consciousness takes place.

How did you start the previous year?

For many people the year 2020 turned life upside down. But life is never a one-way street. How we look at things is a matter of mindset and perspective. How about looking back at the beginning of last year and what thoughts you had then. Did you have any resolutions on how you would approach the year? Did those resolutions come into fruition? In fact studies show that most people give up on their resolutions before the month of January has even ended.

A much better way of starting the New Year is by reflecting on the blessings of the past year. What were those five best moments and successes you had? Looking back will help you pick up on the positive lessons you learned and what positive habits you can build on.  What is it you want to choose and learn from in 2020?

  • What three key lessons did I learn in  2020?
  • What has to be accepted that cannot be changed?

Starting a daily gratitude ritual

Numerous studies show that people who have a daily gratitude practice and who count their blessings are happier in their lives. It shifts your  attention from what is negative to what is positive in your life.

There are two exercises you could do in making the start of the year more positive. Start and end your day with a gratitude ritual. What three major positive experiences, meetings, or insights did I have during the past 24 hours?

We instinctively know that living a more fulfilled and happier life is linked to what habits we pursue. This is why we like to clean the slate and start the New Year with a positive outlook. But there are two common mistakes why most people give-up on their good intentions:

  • The plan is too ambitious and unrealistic. A long list of all the things you want to change will leave you with nothing done. Keep what you want to change short, simple and realistic. If you want to get out of debt. Start by putting a small amount of money onto a savings account every month and don’t touch it. If you want to exercise more, start with a short ten-minute walk instead of trying to do a half hour every day. Improve on your diet and avoid all white sugars as a first start. Small changes in your daily routine, done every day of every week and every month bring about the big changes.
  • Negative self-talk will inevitably scuttle all your good intentions. How you talk to yourself has an immense influence. “I will never be able to do this?” “I’m not good at this.” “I was just born fat and ugly.” “Life is just the way it is and I just have to bear with it.” Try to turn the conversation around. “What can I learn from this?” “I love and accept myself unconditionally.” “I am blessed, everything is good and will turn out fine in the end.”

Change comes with small steps

Changing your set routines and habits starts with small baby steps. A good way of tricking the mind into doing something positive is by “piggy backing” a positive habit with an existing habit. If you have to take the dog out for a walk anyway, try taking a different route next time and walking a little longer. Or park the car some distance away from your workplace so that you are forced to do that extra walking. Replace a negative thought with a positive thought. Try breaking typical routines like reading a chapter in a good self-help book instead of spending the evening watching Netflix.

Highly successful people never rest on their laurels. They are continuously refining on their self-development, knowledge, associations, physical and mental well-being. It is in finding true purpose that we become who we are meant to be from the day we were born. Quiet moments of introspection, meditation and deep walking in nature are crucial for realignment and aligning your intentions with the intentions of the universe.

Reino Gevers – Author. Mentor. Speaker

One more thing…

I have a special New Year offer on my latest book “Deep Walking for Body, Mind and Soul”. If you buy my new video Deep Walking with the key lessons from the book in my store, I will send you the paperback edition of the book for FREE.

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Filed under mental health, mental-health

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