Category Archives: mental-health

Redefining Masculinity: Traits Young Men Need Today

It has become a common story: a mother quietly confesses that her 30-something son is still living at home, unemployed, spending most of his days in the basement playing PC games—while his sister is thriving on every level and living the life of her dreams.

Figures from the United States, the United Kingdom, and the European Union reflect a rising trend: an estimated one in five men over 30 still lives in the parental home. Meanwhile, 63 per cent of men aged 18–29 are single, while women are surpassing their male counterparts in both education and income.

My recent Blog post on “Young Men: Angry, Isolated and Armed” touched a nerve because it captured something unfolding quietly but urgently: amid a growing mental-health crisis, young men are withdrawing into isolation or channelling their shame and frustration into outdated, hyper-aggressive role models, many of them fueled by right-wing extremist groups.

Technological and cultural shifts have opened unprecedented opportunities for young women—changes that their mothers and grandmothers could only dream of. Equal opportunity and equal pay were long overdue. But the traditional image of masculinity as the stoic provider, unflinching warrior, emotional brick wall, no longer fits into a modern world in which connection, communication, and adaptability matter more than ever.

So what are young women seeking in a partner today? And how do we define healthy masculinity in this new landscape?

Across many studies, three traits consistently appear as the most desired qualities in a long-term partner: kindness, intelligence, and confidence. They are foundational to stable relationships, but they are also widely misunderstood.

Kindness is not passivity or people-pleasing. It is emotional steadiness, especially in times of struggle or pain. It shows up in how a man treats others, especially family members, friends, and strangers. Men high in kindness respond to stress with calm problem-solving rather than withdrawal or aggression. Kindness begins with self-respect; young men must learn to accept and care for themselves before that inner stability can radiate outward.

Intelligence is not about high IQ scores or academic pedigree. It is the ability to navigate life with self-awareness, adaptability, and emotional understanding. Intelligent partners can manage their emotions, communicate clearly, listen actively, and reflect honestly on their own behaviour. They do not hide behind logic to avoid vulnerability or connection.

Confidence is perhaps the most misinterpreted trait of all. True confidence is quiet, grounded self-assurance—not the loud, performative “alpha” posturing that dominates so much online discourse. Confident men know who they are and do not need to brag, dominate, or seek constant validation. They can have difficult conversations without collapsing into defensiveness. They avoid unnecessary conflict—not from fear, but from maturity. This is where healthy masculine strength shows its true form: protective, steady, and principled.

These three traits aren’t random. Together, they form the bedrock of a healthy long-term relationship: a partner who is emotionally safe, self-aware, capable of repair, and stable during conflict.

To make this more tangible, here are some widely recognised men in entertainment who are publicly perceived as embodying kindness, intelligence, or confidence, while acknowledging we cannot know their private lives:

Keanu Reeves is often cited as the gold standard of humble, grounded kindness, giving generously without seeking credit. Tom Hanks represents steadiness and emotional warmth and is seen as approachable and gracious.

Ethan Hawke, symbolises intelligence as a deeply reflective and thoughtful artist. He writes books, directs films and speaks creatively with nuance. John Krasinski balances his humour with intelligent storytelling.

Men who symbolize grounded confidence are Idris Elba with a calm, steady presence and Mahershala Ali (Green Book) who embodies a quiet power and self-assurance.

The crisis facing young men today is not simply about a lack of economic opportunity; it is a crisis of identity. As society rapidly evolves, many young men are left without a clear model of what it means to be strong, successful, and valued in today’s world. But the path forward is not found in nostalgia for outdated roles or in reactionary anger. It lies in cultivating traits that make relationships—and communities—thrive: kindness, intelligence, and confidence grounded in self-awareness rather than ego.

If young men can embrace these qualities, they won’t just meet the expectations of a fast-changing world—they will exceed them. And in doing so, they will rediscover a masculinity that is not lost, but evolving: resilient, emotionally present, relationally strong, and profoundly needed.

Reino Gevers – Host of the LivingToBe podcast

P.S.: If you enjoyed this article, you might be interested in my latest book, Sages, Saints, and Sinners. Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever good books are sold.

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The Sacred Bond Between Dogs and Humans

Yesterday, I had to make a very difficult decision in letting go of my beloved Dalmatian, Klara, who has been a faithful companion through the seasons of my life for over fourteen and a half years. Her gentle presence, unwavering loyalty, and unconditional love have been a constant reminder of the sacred bond that exists between dogs and their humans.

Dogs are spiritual beings. Their devotion and ability to love without condition form a bridge between the seen and the unseen, assisting us on our soul’s journey in ways we often only begin to understand when they are gone.

Every dog owner who has shared a deep bond with their four-legged friend will tell you that dogs can sense our emotions long before we consciously recognize them ourselves. They seem to perceive energy fields and emotional undercurrents that go beyond human understanding.

The Science Behind Emotional Connection

Interestingly, modern science is beginning to confirm what dog lovers have always known in their hearts. There’s now solid scientific evidence that dogs can detect and respond to human emotions through scent.

Studies using physiological measures — such as cortisol levels, heart rate, and fMRI brain scans — reveal that dogs can literally smell our emotional states. These scent cues influence their own behavior and even their stress responses.

  • A 2018 study published in Animal Cognition exposed dogs to sweat samples from humans who had watched either a scary or a neutral video. Dogs who sniffed “fear sweat” showed higher heart rates, sought comfort from their owners, and avoided strangers.
  • A 2022 study at Queen’s University Belfast trained dogs to distinguish between stress-related sweat and breath samples versus neutral ones. Astonishingly, the dogs identified the “stress” samples correctly 94% of the time after just a few trials.

These findings show that dogs can detect emotions such as fear, anxiety, sadness, and happiness through subtle chemical shifts tied to hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. They use this information to adjust their behavior — offering comfort, staying close, or becoming cautious — depending on what we’re feeling.

Dogs as Mirrors of Our Inner World

Beyond their empathy, dogs often mirror aspects of our own nature that invite us to grow.

  • A dog that shows exceptional love may be teaching us to open our hearts more fully.
  • A stubborn dog might be reminding us to loosen our own rigidity.
  • A loyal dog teaches us the deep beauty of steadfastness.

When I had a Rhodesian Ridgeback, it taught me the power of focus and presence. If my mind wandered during our walks, my dog would sense it immediately, pulling in all directions or breaking free to chase a rabbit. The lesson was clear: stay present.

Dogs even reflect us in surprising physical ways. Some adopt the walking gait of their owners — and there are remarkable stories of dogs developing a limp to mirror an injured owner, even walking on three legs in solidarity.

Timeless Companionship

When I was a teenager, I had a fox terrier named Stompie who would wait by the gate each day precisely at the moment I returned from school. Decades later, Klara — who lost her hearing two years ago — would still be waiting on the terrace just minutes before my arrival, somehow sensing I was on my way home. That intuitive bond transcends logic; it belongs to the language of love and connection that dogs seem to speak fluently.

The Neurology of Love

Recent studies show that the dog–owner relationship activates brain regions similar to those seen in the infant–mother bond. In dogs, the reward center of the brain responds more strongly to their owner’s voice than to that of a familiar person. More attached dogs show even greater neural activity when hearing their owner’s praise — evidence that the emotional connection runs deep on both sides.

At Harvard University, researchers are now studying how social bonds between children and their pet dogs develop over time — exploring whether these relationships can help reduce stress for both child and dog alike. The answers may help us better understand what many of us already know intuitively: love shared with a dog is healing, grounding, and transformative.

Klara’s passing has left a void in my home and in my heart but also a profound gratitude for the years we shared. Her spirit, like so many beloved companions before her, reminds me that love never truly leaves. It simply changes form, waiting patiently for us, just as our dogs always have.

Reino Gevers – Host of the LivingToBe podcast

P.S.: If you enjoyed this article, you might be interested in my latest book, Sages, Saints, and Sinners. Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever good books are sold.

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The COVID-19 Legacy: Social Fragmentation and Healing

Two years ago, the World Health Organization (WHO) declared that the COVID-19 pandemic was no longer a public health emergency. Yet its psychological and social aftershocks continue to ripple through societies, fragmenting communities once gripped by fear and fueling political extremism.

Several studies have now confirmed what many suspected: the pandemic and ensuing lockdowns had a profound impact on mental health worldwide. For the first time in history, scientists were able to observe the effects of collective fear on a truly global scale.

The Emotional Toll

While experiences varied across regions and communities, several broad patterns emerged:

  • Prolonged uncertainty, isolation, and fear led to widespread anxiety, depression, and burnout.
  • Eroding trust became a defining feature, as people grew confused and skeptical toward governments, media, and even science amid rapidly shifting information.
  • Collective grief settled over the world, a mourning not only for lost lives, but also for lost time, normalcy, and connection.

Shifting Social Landscapes

Communities fractured along new fault lines with differing views on vaccines, lockdowns, and mask mandates dividing families, friends, and neighbors.
Technology became both a lifeline and a liability: it kept people connected yet deepened isolation, fatigue, and exposure to misinformation and conspiracy theories.

The Mind–Body Connection

Emotional stress is one of the most significant threats to both mental and physical health. Neuroscience and medical research have long shown that chronic activation of the body’s stress response can harm nearly every system, especially the immune and cardiovascular systems.

  • The Whitehall Studies in the U.K. found that chronic job stress increases the risk of heart disease.
  • The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study revealed that early-life emotional trauma elevates the risk of chronic illness in adulthood.

The link between mind and body is undeniable—but so too is our capacity for resilience.

Cultivating Resilience

Research shows that stress resilience or the ability to recover from emotional adversity can buffer these effects. Protective factors include:

  • Strong social connections
  • Spiritual or faith practices
  • Mindfulness and meditation
  • Regular exercise and restorative sleep
  • A deep sense of purpose or meaning

A Shared Awakening

The pandemic also ignited a global period of reflection on mortality, interdependence, and renewal. Many rediscovered spirituality, nature, and the quiet power of mindfulness. For perhaps the first time in modern memory, humanity was united by a shared awareness of its own fragility.

A Creative Rebirth

For me personally, the lockdown became a period of unexpected inspiration. It was during this time that I began writing my novel Sages, Saints and Sinners. In my research, I discovered haunting parallels between our modern experience and the Black Death of medieval times, echoing the same fear, isolation, and uncertainty, followed ultimately by rebirth.

Reino Gevers – Host of the LivingToBe podcast

P.S.: If you enjoyed this article, you might be interested in my latest book, Sages, Saints, and Sinners. Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever good books are sold.

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The Evolutionary Advantage of Empathy

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
– Maya Angelou

Empathy is our greatest evolutionary strength. While Social Darwinists argue that survival belongs to the strongest and most ruthless, history and science tell a different story. Humanity’s ability to connect, and to uplift one another has ensured our survival as a species.

Elon Musk’s belief that Western civilization’s greatest weakness is its empathy is not backed up by the science. Social Darwinism and much of the rightwing media ecosystem argue that the “strong” rise to the top and the “weak” fail, justifying economic inequality. Empathy is perceived as vulnerability and weakness in the competitive business environment.

Empathy is often confused with passivity and “people pleasing”. However, numerous studies confirm that empathy is actually a strength, fostering trust, enhancing decision-making, and building strong relationships.

Leaders with empathy are more effective

A study by the Center for Creative Leadership (Gentry, Weber, & Sadri, 2016) found that leaders who demonstrate empathy perform better and are more effective in managing teams. Employees who feel understood and valued are more engaged and productive.

Contrary to the belief that empathy clouds judgment, research shows it actually helps people make more ethical and fair decisions. A study published in The Journal of Business Ethics (Wang, Hackett, & Cao, 2016) found that empathetic leaders were more likely to make morally sound decisions that benefited both individuals and organizations.

A global study by the Businessolver 2021 State of Workplace Empathy Report found that 92 per cent of employees believe empathy is undervalued in the workplace, and 72 per cent of CEOs say empathy directly impacts financial performance.

Empathy as Strength

Rather than being a liability, empathy is a strategic advantage—helping individuals and organizations thrive through stronger relationships, ethical leadership, and enhanced decision-making. True empathy is not about weakness or passivity but about understanding others while maintaining boundaries and making informed, impactful choices.

A society based on Social Darwinism where the strongest, wealthiest and most powerful are venerated is a doomed society that is less compassionate, less caring, and less kind. It is the very opposite of value-based Western society based on the fundamentals of Christian values such as caring for the sick and needy and the most vulnerable in society.

Empathy has been a critical factor in the survival and success of the human species. While physical strength and intelligence played roles, our ability to cooperate, understand, and support each other has been one of the most significant evolutionary advantages.

Unlike solitary species, early humans relied on group survival. Anthropologists like Sarah Blaffer Hrdy (Mothers and Others, 2009) argue that empathy—especially in the form of cooperative child-rearing—was key to human evolution. Groups that cared for their weak, sick, or young had a higher survival rate than those that abandoned struggling members.

In the global happiness Index, Scandinavian societies, particularly Finland have consistently polled highest as the most happy societies. Finnish society is characterized by high levels of trust—both in fellow citizens and in public institutions. This trust is nurtured by subtle yet deep social bonds where empathy helps people understand and support one another, even in a culture that might appear reserved at first glance.

Finland’s robust welfare system amplifies these effects by ensuring that people feel cared for by society.

This creates a virtuous cycle—when people see their society as compassionate and responsive, their own empathetic behaviors are reinforced, further boosting overall happiness.

Research in positive psychology has linked empathy with higher levels of life satisfaction and emotional well-being. Empathetic interactions help reduce feelings of isolation and stress, which are key factors in long-term happiness.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor –Speaker

If you enjoyed this article you might be interested in my latest book: Sages, Saints and Sinners to be launched globally on April 8th, 2025.

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Filed under happiness, Happiness Index, humanity, mental health, mental-health, psychology, self-development

The Illusion of Benevolent Authoritarianism

A rightwing media ecosystem has created the dangerous illusion that a benevolent authoritarian regime creates a more stable, equal, and prosperous society.

A common misconception is that strong, centralized rule brings order and stability. The reality is far bleaker. Having grown up in apartheid South Africa and visited communist East Germany multiple times, I’ve seen firsthand how authoritarian rule breeds fear, stagnation, and deep societal misery.

Police brutality and oppression of dissent are commonplace

Although a small minority of white people in South Africa benefited from apartheid, it came at a huge price. With growing dissent and unrest coming from the oppressed black majority, state-sanctioned police brutality and oppression of opposition movements were commonplace. Every young white South African male was conscripted for military service after graduating from school. Many, including some of my own family members, are still traumatized today from fighting a senseless war in Angola.

Both South Africa and more so communist East Germany relied on heavy policing and informant networks. Friends, neighbors and even family members spied on each other.

When I first visited East Germany in the late 1980s, I was struck by the pervasive presence of the Stasi secret police, whose surveillance began the moment we crossed the border. The atmosphere was stifling—grey skies, empty stores, and a palpable fear that made any interaction with locals feel tense and uncomfortable. The waiters in the restaurants were unfriendly and even rude.

Scars remain etched in the collective psyche for generations

After the fall of the Iron Curtain and the reunification of East and West Germany, the scars of the communist era remained deeply etched in the collective psyche. The loss of national identity, coupled with an education system that falsely pinned the blame for Nazi atrocities on West Germany, contributed to a resurgence of fascist nationalism in the former communist regions, leaving a legacy of division and disillusionment.

When power dominates over kindness and compassion, it can take generations for a country to heal. People often adopt a survival mindset, prioritizing self-interest over community well-being. Corruption becomes normalized, and moral considerations take a backseat to personal gain, particularly prevalent in the former Soviet Union and its satellite countries.

Democratic countries in the long-term are far more successful economically. Free speech encourages artistic creativity. Free societies and open markets create a competitive environment with new innovations and technological advancement.

Democratic freedoms create happy societies

It is not surprising that the Scandinavian countries with strong workers’ rights, excellent social welfare, and lower income inequality, also find themselves on the top of the global happiness index. Finland has maintained the top position for six consecutive years, reflecting its strong social support systems, high levels of trust, and overall quality of life.

It appears that strong community bonds and supportive communities play a crucial part when it comes to longevity, mental and physical health. People thrive in democracies that are more sustainable, innovative, and equitable.

A system where the powerful rule, without checks and balances such as free media and rule of law, typically are prone to corruption, mismanagement, and crony capitalism. Control over media and education stifles critical thinking and creativity, slowing technological progress. In Nazi Germany, scientific research was distorted by racial theories with disastrous consequences.

Authoritarianism destroys human dignity

Authoritarianism may offer short-term order, but ultimately leads to oppression, destruction of all human dignity, social fragmentation, economic stagnation, and instability. Fear, oppression, and lack of autonomy contribute to widespread psychological distress. Political oppression, imprisonment, and violence leave lasting psychological scars, often lasting for generations.

Democracy despite all its flaws is the oxygen where humans thrive. The freedoms and values we enjoy in democratic societies are all too seldom cherished. To quote Martin Luther King: “The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.”

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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This too shall pass

“Like river tides and autumn leaves,
All things must drift, all things must weave.
No hand can hold the fleeting dawn,
For what is here will soon be gone.”
— Unknown

External events, such as elections and economic cycles, can easily consume all your attention, pulling you away from your true purpose and inner joy. You may perceive the world as chaotic, making it harder to focus on the person you are meant to become.

If recent political events have left you feeling disheartened, powerless, or overwhelmed, know that you are not alone. Take comfort in the timeless wisdom: “This too shall pass.” Challenges are temporary, and no moment—good or bad—lasts forever. Stay grounded, keep perspective, and trust in your resilience.

The origins of the expression are unclear. According to Jewish folklore, King Solomon is said to have asked his advisors for something that would keep him grounded. They presented him with a ring inscribed with “Gam zeh ya’avor” (גם זה יעבור), which translates as “This too shall pass.”

The phrase has also been linked to several other traditions and later gained popularity in Western culture, and was famously quoted by Abraham Lincoln in a speech in 1859.

Lincoln made his remarks at the Wisconsin State Fair in Milwaukee, at a time of looming civil war, and rising political divisions over the slavery issue. He referenced an Eastern monarch who sought a phrase from advisors that would always be true in both good and bad times.

The answer he received was “This too shall pass away.” Lincoln used this phrase to highlight the idea that all circumstances—whether good or bad—are temporary.

The phrase serves as a powerful reminder to the wealthy, the powerful, and the arrogant that humility is essential, and success can be fleeting.

Just as nature moves through its cycles, life is impermanent, with good and bad times constantly shifting. Those who remain attached to power and wealth are especially vulnerable to these unpredictable forces, much like the changing seasons. They cannot be controlled.

Seizing back control when life becomes challenging

In the winter season of life, external events can at times be very challenging. But there are ways of how you can seize back control by focusing on those things that you can control:

  • Accepting a reality does not mean that you approve of it
  • You can control your response and your emotions to external events
  • Remind yourself that nothing lasts forever including challenging times

You can reframe your perspective into a question:

What can I learn from this and what opportunity may arise from this situation?

This is a time to build resilience by strengthening body, mind, and spirit. Falling into despondency and negativity will not serve you well. Try limiting your exposure to negativity such as negative social media and news events. Surround yourself with positive people and do things that boost your vibrational energy.

Practicing Gratitude

Being grateful for those things that are going well in your life can be a powerful tool of reframing emotions and feelings. Write down every day three things you can be truly grateful for.

Letting go of attachments to beliefs, perspectives, and emotions is a journey. Realigning with the rhythms of nature—listening to the wind, the rustling leaves, birds singing or the gentle flow of water—can be profoundly healing.

A deep walking meditation in nature allows for a reset, grounding yourself in the present moment. Whenever you feel weighed down, shift your focus to your breath. With each inhale, reconnect to your true self; with each exhale, release what no longer serves you.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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The Power of Forgiveness: Doing it the Right Way

The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.

– Mahatma Gandhi-

Many misconceptions surround the act of forgiveness, especially when it involves those who have caused you the most pain. However, when practiced with true intention, forgiveness is not about excusing harm but about freeing yourself from the emotional weight of resentment and anger. By embracing forgiveness the right way, you elevate your vibrational energy, fostering inner peace, and a greater sense of emotional and spiritual well-being.

Holding onto a grudge, hate or resentment creates stress while forgiveness creates inner peace and restores the trust in human connections.

Most spiritual traditions emphasize forgiveness as a path to enlightenment, inner peace, and a sense of purpose but there are many misconceptions about forgiveness, often amplified by religious doctrine.

Studies show that forgiveness can lower blood pressure, improve heart health, and reduce chronic stress. The body and mind are deeply connected, and forgiveness can lead to measurable health improvements.

It does not mean that you have to restore a relationship with the person who has caused you much pain but releasing yourself from the toxic emotions related to that incident.

Common misconceptions about forgiveness are that you are excusing the behavior of the person who has hurt you or that you must reconcile with the offender. Forgiveness is not weakness but takes takes strength and courage in facing your own shadow.

In a recent conversation on my Living to BE podcast with forgiveness expert Katharine Giovanni we delved into the typical misconceptions about forgiveness, many of them stemming from early childhood patterns. The key takeaways from her new book “The Ultimate Path to Forgiveness”:

  • Emotional freedom and harmony is a long-term process
  • Forgiveness is a step-by-step process that can transform the soul
  • You can practice forgiveness without physically meeting the person who has caused you pain and even with those who have long passed.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

You can watch the podcast interview with Katharine Giovanni here and also on the Youtube channel Living to BE

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Stupidity and Evil: Bonhoeffer’s Insights

“Stupidity is a more dangerous enemy of the good than malice, because malice can be exposed and prevented by the use of force, but against stupidity we are defenseless.”- Dietrich Bonhoeffer –

The German theologian and dissident Dietrich Bonhoeffer is renowned for his unwavering faith, ethical convictions, and reflections on what it means to be a Christian in times of crisis. Sentenced to death in a sham trial by the Nazis, his philosophy on stupidity and evil remains strikingly relevant today, amid the resurgence of rightwing extremism.

In the weeks leading up to his execution, Bonhoeffer deeply reflected. He considered how ordinary, decent people abandoned independent thought and passively accepted horrific evil.

Bonhoeffer was arrested by the Nazis in April 1943 and held in a Berlin prison until his execution in April 1945 only weeks before the end of World War II. During his time in prison he outlined in his Letters and Prayers from Prison, a compelling view on the moral failings of a society leading up to authoritarian rule.

It is a stark warning to developments in today’s world marked by misinformation and the erosion of democratic norms and values in Western democracies.

Stupidity is more dangerous than evil?

He argued that stupidity was even more dangerous than evil because people were blind to reason and resistant to correction. Unlike an evil person, the stupid person is unaware of his own ignorance and can easily be manipulated by dark forces. A stupid person or a person stuck in an ego personality will also never admit that they made a mistake.

The theologian observed that individuals become even more foolish when becoming part of “group-think”, especially under authoritarian regimes. When individuals surrender independent thought to a group they become incapable of critical self-reflection, making them susceptible to propaganda.

People become particularly susceptible to stupidity and evil if they surrender their moral and intellectual independence to an external authority.

To resist this, according to Bonhoeffer individuals must be liberated through self-reflection and self-work:

  • Develop a strong ethical foundation based on conscience rather than blind obedience. He warned that authoritarian regimes manipulate people by dulling their moral senses. Behavior that would never have been tolerated under normal circumstances becomes the norm.
  • As a Christian theologian, Bonhoeffer emphasized that faith in God should lead to courage and resistance against injustice. True discipleship means refusing to be complicit with evil.
  • In oppressive systems people stop thinking for themselves. Encouraging education, open dialogue, and debate can counteract this.

Developing internal and external freedom

Bonhoeffer also recognized that internal liberation needed to be aligned at the same time with external freedom. He advocated for:

  • A just society required strong institutions that upheld justice and human dignity.
  • Bonhoeffer himself took direct action against the Nazi regime, arguing that when a state becomes oppressive, Christians and moral individuals must resist, even at great personal cost.
  • Oppressive systems isolate individuals to maintain control. Bonhoeffer emphasized the importance of ethical communities that support and empower individuals to act against injustice.

Bonhoeffer deeply believed in the interconnection between internal and external freedom. A society that values fundamental democratic freedoms will create conditions where moral and intellectual independence thrive.

People who are empowered by taking personal responsibility will challenge unjust systems rather than surrender to conformity. It is a powerful argument for the role of ethics, faith, and personal responsibility in protecting democracy.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

You can watch the podcast interview with Katharine Giovanni here and also on the Youtube channel Living to BE

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Emotions and Health: The Hidden Connection

As you embrace the New Year with fresh intentions and resolutions, it’s crucial to recognize the emotional stressors that deeply impact your physical, mental, and spiritual health.

The medieval Sephardic Jewish philosopher Maimonides emphasized a holistic approach to health, integrating the physical, spiritual, and emotional dimensions of well-being. He notably highlighted chronic anger as one of the most harmful emotions.

Modern science echoes these teachings, revealing a growing body of evidence that underscores the importance of managing emotions and fostering mental health for overall physical well-being.

The Harmful Effects of Emotional Stress

Emotional stress profoundly affects physical health, serving as a root cause of numerous conditions such as arthritis, cardiovascular disease, and certain cancers. Chronic stress also lowers your energetic vibration, pulling your mindset toward negativity, where you’re more likely to perceive—and attract—negative outcomes.

A study at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh has revealed perhaps the strongest evidence so far on the link between stress and the body’s capacity to deal with inflammation.

In moments of intense anger, pain, or fear, the prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain responsible for creative thinking and problem-solving—essentially shuts down, leaving you reactive and unfocused.

Short-term stress can be beneficial, such as helping you react quickly to avoid a car accident. However, chronic stress floods the body with hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, which overburden vital organs such as the heart, kidneys, and liver. Prolonged stress also disrupts digestion and contributes to inflammatory diseases.

The Impact of Social Media and Negative Narratives

Modern stressors include the pervasive influence of social media. A poll of 14-to-24-year-olds revealed that platforms like Instagram and Snapchat amplify feelings of anxiety and inadequacy, often fueled by negative comments on appearance and self-image. Research from the University of Pennsylvania even found a strong correlation between negative language on Twitter and heart disease mortality.

Harnessing the Power of Choice

The encouraging news is that you have the power to choose your emotional and mental state. Positive emotions such as gratitude and happiness enhance immune function and promote longevity. Practices like laughter and optimism stimulate the production of natural killer cells that fight infection, while a positive outlook fosters healthier lifestyle habits.

Practical Steps Toward Resilience

To build resilience and effectively handle life’s challenges, consider these practices:

  • Nutrition and Exercise: Adopt a diet rich in high-nutritional-value foods and maintain regular physical activity.
  • Nature and Surroundings: Spend time in attractive, natural environments to rejuvenate your spirit.
  • Spiritual Practice: Incorporate mindfulness or meditation into your daily routine.
  • Emotional Shifting: Begin by accepting your current emotional state—be it anger, sadness, or fear. Fighting these emotions only reinforces them. Instead, focus on your breath: inhale and exhale deeply through your nose while counting to ten. This mindfulness can help you emotionally shift, replacing fear with trust, sadness with a joyful memory, or anger with calmness.

Guarding the Doorway of Your Mind

In today’s world, where grievance culture and negativity often dominate the narrative, it’s more important than ever to protect your mental state. Surround yourself with positive-minded people, and cultivate gratitude through daily rituals. For example, reflect on the best moment of the past 24 hours—it’s there, waiting to be appreciated.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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Walking the Camino: Lessons in Life and Faith

Walking the Camino is a spiritual journey that mirrors the journey of life, unfolding in three profound stages: a beginning, a middle, and an end. Kierkegaard describes these three stages of life as the aesthetic, the ethical, and the religious.

The first stage—the crucifixion—represents the struggle and hardship of making mistakes, forcing the boat upstream, and losing your way on the wrong path. During the first stage in life we face trial and error, effort often feels futile. You sometimes engage in aimless wandering and deviations. You may easily lose your way with countless distractions in the monkey mind.

The middle stage, symbolized by the Valley of Death or the Meseta, is a surrender of the ego to a higher purpose and deeper meaning. Here, the ego must die for the soul to awaken to its inner truth, allowing for transformation and clarity.

According to Kierkegaard the appeal during this “ethical stage” lies in walking the path with confidence, even though it may be monotonous and exhausting at times.

The final stage—the resurrection—is a state of flow, where you align with the current of life and begin to see that every experience, even the challenges, has been an expression of divine grace, sculpting you into the BEING you were always meant to become.

You feel the ecstasy in the dance of life. Your walk is a gentle surfing of the path without a sense of gravity. There is an unspoken faith in the journey that drives you forward, and quickens your pace.

Reaching the Cathedral of Santiago is a celebration of joy and homecoming, marking the soul’s return to its true essence. Ultimately, the Camino is a journey of the soul, finding its way back home.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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