Tag Archives: faith

by | December 1, 2025 · 9:45 am

Transforming Pain: Cultivating True Gratitude

You may find yourself in the midst of one of life’s more challenging chapters marked by grief, uncertainty, or loss. Then, as if on cue, a well-meaning friend offers the familiar advice: “Just be grateful.” In that moment, you might feel an angry urge to say: “You don’t understand.” And the weight grows heavier when you begin comparing your life to those who seem happier, wealthier, healthier, or younger, as if their brightness somehow dims your own.

But here’s the deeper truth: you cannot silence authentic emotions such as sadness, despair, or fear by layering them with forced gratitude. Emotional honesty is not weakness; it’s the foundation of healing. Gratitude only becomes meaningful when it arises from a place of full acceptance and when you allow yourself to feel everything that is part of you without self-judgment.

“I am feeling sad. I am disappointed. I am angry. And still, there are things I can be grateful for.”

This is where healing begins. When you make a habit of connecting the dots between past experiences and present growth, you start to see a deeper pattern.

There comes that quiet reassurance that the universe has always had your back. Even the darkest moments often conceal unexpected blessings, pushing you to tap into inner reserves of strength and begin anew.

I’ve lived through many moments of profound despair, and I suspect you have too. Relationship breakdowns, the untimely loss of loved ones, financial setbacks, and health scares. Yet in hindsight, these painful milestones have often marked the beginning of something transformative.

Technologically, humanity has made extraordinary progress in recent decades. But this advancement has come at a steep personal and environmental cost. Our lives today are faster, more connected, and paradoxically more stressed. We have more time than any generation before us, and yet time has become our most precious, elusive commodity.

This revolution forces us to confront an ancient question:

What truly makes you content and fulfilled?

The thrill of a shiny new object fades quickly. What endures is meaning and purpose.

Every extreme carries within it the seed of renewal. The technological age has amplified our left-brain — analytical, data-driven, “spreadsheet” thinking — while the right-brain, our intuitive, creative, and spiritual side, remains undernourished. Yet it is this neglected dimension that holds the key to balance.

We are not just rational beings. We are playful, imaginative, soulful creatures. Reclaiming that part of the self — and integrating both hemispheres of the mind — is the challenge of our time. Just because you are going through a dark chapter, doesn’t mean you cannot have a beautiful life. Peace comes from going all in on accepting yourself and building on the habits and tools that elevate healing and growth.

How can I do a reset?

Begin with small, intentional rituals that reconnect you to gratitude — not as a forced emotion, but as a recognition and acceptance of life’s complexity and beauty. Here are three daily practices to help you cultivate authentic gratitude:

Morning Reflection

Before reaching for your phone, take three minutes to sit quietly and ask: What is one thing I’m grateful for today — even if it’s small? It could be the warmth of a comfortable bed, the sound of birds, or simply waking up and still being alive, perhaps thanking God, or the universe for a new day.

Gratitude Journal

Each evening, write down three things that brought you comfort, joy, or insight — even if the day was difficult. Over time, this builds a reservoir of perspective and emotional resilience.

Sharing Gratitude

Make it a daily practice to express appreciation — whether through a heartfelt compliment, a sincere thank-you, or a simple kind word. When you share in someone else’s joy or gratitude, you amplify it. Gratitude shared is gratitude multiplied, and it deepens the bonds that connect us.

These rituals aren’t about denying pain or pretending everything is fine. They’re about honouring the full spectrum of your experience while gently creating space for light to return. Gratitude, when rooted in truth, becomes a quiet but potent force for healing, resilience, and renewal.

“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is ‘thank you,’ it will be enough.”
— Meister Eckhart

This simple yet profound reminder by the great 13th-century Mystic invites you to see gratitude as a way of being and a sacred thread that weaves through joy and sorrow alike, anchoring you in the beauty of presence and opening to grace.

Reino Gevers – Host of the LivingToBe podcast

P.S.: If you enjoyed this article, you might be interested in my latest book, Sages, Saints, and Sinners. Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever good books are sold.

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by | September 1, 2025 · 9:34 am

The Gift of Money: Spiritual Perspectives

Since the earliest days of organized religion, money has played a pivotal role. It has been used to “spread the word” and to entrench religious power, sometimes abused for exploitation, but also put to good use. It has funded countless schools, hospitals, and welfare that shaped much of our society today.

The Roman Catholic Church, for centuries, built its power on a system of tithes. People were taught that by giving money, they could buy tickets out of purgatory and into heaven.

My own family’s story is intertwined with the Lutheran tradition. My grandparents were hardworking farmers who managed to build some wealth through self-sufficiency and discipline. But extravagance was frowned upon. Any money not reinvested in the farm usually went to the church. Holidays, luxury clothing, and even the small consumer comforts that many middle-class families enjoy today were considered wasteful. The unspoken rule was simple: every cent could be put to “better use.”

Is money the root of all evil?

I often heard the phrase: “Money is the root of all evil.” It shaped me more than I realized. Wealth, if earned at all, had to come through sweat, toil, and tears. Quick fortunes, whether through inheritance or the stock market, were regarded with suspicion. For years, I carried this heavy view of money as something dangerous, almost shameful.

But over time, I began to see that this idea rested on a mistranslation. Paul actually wrote: “The love of money is a root of all kinds of evil” (1 Timothy 6:10). Not money itself, but the love of it, the obsession, the addiction, the false security it promises. That realization was freeing. Money is not moral or immoral; it is neutral. It simply amplifies what is already in us.

Money amplifies character

I have seen this truth play out in my own circle. Friends who were always kind and generous only became more so when entrusted with wealth. They gave freely, they created opportunities, they lifted others up. But those who were by nature fearful, self-centered or controlling became even more so once money entered their lives.

I also found new meaning in the parables I had heard as a child. The Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14–30) used to feel like a simple lesson about money and responsibility, but as an adult it spoke to me on a deeper level. In the story, a master entrusts his servants with sums of money before leaving on a journey. Two of them take risks, invest, and return with more than they were given. The third buries his portion in the ground, paralyzed by fear of losing it. When the master returns, he praises the first two as faithful and trustworthy, but calls the last one lazy and casts him out.

For me, this is no longer a story about coins or wealth. It is a metaphor for life itself. Each of us is entrusted with something: gifts, time, energy, relationships, and resources. To bury those gifts, to let fear dictate our choices, is to betray the trust of the One who gave them to us in the first place.

The ultimate sin, I have come to realize, is not failure: It is waste. It is letting your unique talents go unused, your light hidden behind a veil, your voice silenced. From the moment of birth, we are called to grow into the fullness of who we are meant to be. Ignoring that inner calling is not just a missed opportunity. It is, in a sense, a treachery against the soul itself.

Burying your talent, your voice, or even your capacity for love is just as wasteful as burying a coin in the dirt. We are meant to risk, to create, to step out in faith, even if it means stumbling along the way. For it is only in using our gifts, be it wealth, wisdom, or creativity that you truly live in alignment with our calling.

Another great example from scripture is the widow in the temple (Mark 12:41–44). She gave two small coins, all she had, while others gave out of their abundance. Jesus noticed her, not for the amount, but for the spirit of trust with which she gave. That story has always humbled me. It reminds me that generosity has nothing to do with size, but with the heart.

Money is a form of energy

Through these reflections, I began to form a new relationship with money. I no longer see it as shameful or corrupting, but as a form of energy. It can be something that can be directed toward building, healing, and serving. If invested ethically, money can create jobs, sustain communities, and bring hope. Used rightly, it becomes spiritual because it reflects love in action.

I hold onto these mantras now:

  • Money creates freedom of choice.
  • Money provides the means to be generous.
  • Money provides comfort and joy.
  • Money removes anxiety and fear.

When money is a gift, not a god, it can truly serve. As Proverbs 11:25 says: “A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.”

That decision to quit a safe job set me on an entirely new path into writing, podcasting, giving workshops, and exploring the realms of self-realization and spirituality. At first, it felt like stepping into a void, but slowly I discovered that the void was full. Every time I shared my journey, someone would come forward and say, “I needed to hear that.” Every time I gave a workshop, I realized that the experiences and lessons I had once considered private struggles could become bridges of connection.

And strangely, once I began to live into that calling, resources began to align with my purpose. Opportunities opened, doors I couldn’t have forced began to swing wide, and money itself flowed differently, less as something to chase, more as something that supported the work I was meant to do. It was as though life itself was saying: finally, you are using what I gave you.

But the inward and outward journey has shown me a different truth. Money, like talent, is a gift. It is neither evil nor good on its own, but it becomes holy when it is placed in service of something greater. It is energy waiting to be directed. To hoard it, or to bury our gifts in fear, is to shrink from the life we are called to live.

Jesus praised both the servants who multiplied their talents and the widow who gave her last two coins. The size of the gift never matters. What matters is the courage to release it, to trust that God can do more with it than we can ever imagine.

That is the lesson I carry forward: when money is a gift, not a god, it can be a force for freedom, generosity, and joy. And when talents are used, not buried, life opens in unimaginable ways and miracles.

I no longer see money as the root of all evil, nor do I see security as the highest goal. My prayer is simpler now: to be a faithful steward of what I have, to invest in love, to risk my gifts, and to walk each path with trust, knowing that even the detours are part of the journey.

Reino Gevers – Host of the LivingToBe podcast

P.S.: If you enjoyed this article, you might be interested in my latest book, Sages, Saints, and Sinners. Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever good books are sold.

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by | June 30, 2025 · 11:31 am

Reclaiming Democracy: A Call for Moral Action

Authoritarian movements are not historical accidents. They are the outcome of a long, steady erosion of the moral and spiritual foundations that once underpinned Western societies. The Judaic-Christian values that emphasized community, compassion, and responsibility have weakened, leaving a vacuum filled by grievance culture and divisive tribalism.

A growing number of people feel frustrated, aggrieved, and desperate as societies fracture between the privileged and the left-behind. Rapid technological disruption and sweeping social changes have upended long-held certainties. Entire communities have been dislocated, and the Covid-19 pandemic only deepened the sense of instability and loss.

Traditional institutions in education, religion, media, and politics have not addressed the alienation felt by millions. Students of history will recognize these conditions. Today’s authoritarian movements bear an uncanny resemblance to the turmoil and mass manipulation of the late 1920s and 1930s.

In A Preface to Morals (1929), Walter Lippmann foresaw the dangers of moral relativism and cultural drift:

“When men can no longer be the slaves of tradition, they must be the slaves of reason. If they will not be slaves of reason, they must be the slaves of their passions… And if each man is to judge for himself what is true and false, right and wrong, then we are already at the end of civilization.”

Authoritarian movements offer the illusion of safety and belonging. But instead, they further tear apart the fabric of civil society. Families, communities, and congregations fracture into warring factions, each loyal to its own tribe, and its own version of truth.

The Role of Media

Traditional media once acted as a civic compass, a watchdog of power. But in the digital age, social media algorithms amplify the most extreme, emotional, and divisive content. Outrage sells; nuance does not. Facts struggle to compete with feelings. In this climate, truth is no longer a shared destination but a weapon of personal or political gain.

The Sacrifice of Traditional Values

This is fertile ground for demagogues who distort Judaic-Christian values beyond recognition. Empathy is rebranded as a fatal flaw. Power is idolized; the weak and vulnerable are mocked as “parasites.” Even the medieval theology of ordo amoris—originally a call to rightly ordered love—is weaponized to justify a hierarchy of compassion: prioritize citizens over foreigners, neighbors over strangers. In this logic, cutting humanitarian aid for millions of people becomes not just acceptable, but righteous.

Yet most theologians, including Pope Francis, have challenged this interpretation. He reminds us that unconditional love lies at the heart of the Christian faith, and that true morality cannot be confined to borders or tribal interests. The parable of the Good Samaritan teaches that love recognizes no boundary.

As former U.S. President Jimmy Carter once put it:

“It is the weak nation that must behave with bluster, boasting, rashness, and other signs of insecurity.”
Strong societies practice humility. They uphold compassion, generosity, and justice—especially toward the most vulnerable.

The Choice Before Us

With traditional norms under siege and authoritarianism corroding democratic institutions, the burden of responsibility falls on we the people, every one of us. Troubled times, however grim, present a profound opportunity for reflection and moral clarity. There will come the realization that there is no hero coming and no savior on the horizon.

Change begins within—when individuals reclaim their agency, resist distraction, and choose courage over comfort. But it cannot end there. Lasting transformation happens when people come together, organize with purpose, and hold power to account.

For democracy to endure, it must do more than preserve procedures. It must recover its soul and the shared commitment to truth, moral responsibility, and compassion.

A democracy worthy of its name serves all people, not just the powerful elite. It confronts inequality, ensures access to healthcare, housing, and education, and defends the dignity of every human being. It protects the environment not as an afterthought, but as a sacred trust, recognizing that the future of life itself depends on how we care for the Earth today.

Democracy ultimately is not merely a system of governance. It is an expression of our collective values. And its survival depends on whether we are willing to live them.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor –Speaker

P.S: If you enjoyed this article you might be interested in my very latest book: Sages, Saints and Sinners Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and where all good books are sold.

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by | May 26, 2025 · 8:58 am

The peril of rigid belief

Throughout history, one of the most potent catalysts of conflict and war has been humanity’s deep-seated addiction to rigid concepts and beliefs, particularly those rooted in religion, ideology, and political affiliation. These mental fixations often block the path to growth, empathy, and the elevation of consciousness.

While society rightly highlights the dangers of substance addictions like alcohol and drugs, we often overlook an equally destructive force: the psychological and emotional dependence on fixed worldviews. This addiction becomes especially visible during periods of rapid social upheaval and crisis. In such times, people often cling even more tightly to their beliefs, seeking certainty in a world that feels uncertain.

At the heart of these belief systems lies a refusal to entertain alternative perspectives. Even when faced with overwhelming evidence or scientific data, those entrenched in ideological thinking will often reject reason itself. For many, admitting they might be wrong is more terrifying than death. They become prisoners of their own convictions.

Scapegoating and misinformation

The COVID-19 pandemic offered a sobering modern example. As the virus swept across the globe, so too did a parallel wave of conspiracy theories, scapegoating, and misinformation. Rational discourse was drowned out by fanaticism. In many places, especially the United States, this led to deepening political polarization and extremism. Civil debate between differing political camps has become virtually impossible.

During the lockdown, I delved into the social consequences of previous pandemics. One of the most harrowing was the Black Plague of the 14th century, which devastated Europe and left cities and countrysides empty for decades. Faced with unimaginable death, people sought easy answers. In Strasbourg, a vicious rumor claimed Jews had poisoned the water wells, leading to the massacre of the city’s Jewish population. Those who were different—whether in religion, race, or opinion—were blamed.

In my latest book, Sages, Saints and Sinners, I explore how two central characters respond to such a crisis. While some individuals rise to the occasion with compassion and courage, others descend into violence and hatred. This story, rooted in historical truth, offers a mirror to our turbulent times. I encourage you to read it as a call to self-reflection.

Just like substance addiction, ideological addiction often stems from unresolved trauma and fear. In times of economic uncertainty or personal crisis, people gravitate toward simple answers to complex problems. This is the moment when deceivers step in, offering an easy scapegoat: You are not the problem—it’s “them.” The others. The outsiders. Those who think, look, or believe differently from you.

This narrative is tragically familiar. It has fueled genocides, invasions, land thefts, torture, witch hunts, and pogroms. History is littered with the consequences of belief systems weaponized against fellow human beings.

Healing begins within

Ideological fixation poisons the mind. The path to healing begins with honest inner reflection. We must each ask:


What lies beneath my anger, my sadness, my resentment?
How can I transmute these emotions into love, compassion, and understanding?

The responsibility rests with each of us. Our highest calling and our divine purpose is to cultivate and spread love. Love that transcends division. Love that sees the humanity in all beings. Love that embraces life in its fullness.

This is the true revolution. And it begins within.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor –Speaker

P.S: If you enjoyed this article you might be interested in my very latest book: Sages, Saints and Sinners Get it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and where all good books are sold.

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by | April 21, 2025 · 9:48 am

Finding Peace Through Contemplative Prayer

In times of crisis, prayer can become a sacred act of surrender and spiritual growth. When we release the need to control, prayer opens a quiet space where the soul can rest, realign, and remember its connection to the greater Oneness.

Regardless of religious background, contemplative prayer can serve as a lifeline, anchoring the soul in resilience and peace. By turning inward and detaching from external distractions, we remember who we truly are.

The great 13th-century Mystic Meister Eckart describes his concept of prayer as one of “Gebet aus ledigem Gemüt”, which translates from the German as a prayer detached from the conceptual mind – a turning inward to the heart-mind.

The two eyes of the soul

Eckart describes the soul as having two eyes. The soul’s inner eye is that which sees into being, and derives its being without any mediation from God.

The soul’s outer eye is turned toward all creatures, observing them as images and through the ‘powers.’

“Any man who is turned in on himself, so as to know God by His own taste and in His own ground, that man is made free of all created things, and is enclosed in himself in a very castle of truth.

As I once said, our Lord came to his disciples on Easter day behind closed doors.

So it is with this man who is freed from all otherness and all createdness: God does not come into this man – He is essentially within him.” (Meister Eckhart, The Complete Works of Meister Eckhart, Sermon 66, Page 336)

For Eckhart, prayer “aus ledigem Gemüt” was a contemplative state of inner stillness with the soul liberated from all egoic desire and becoming receptive to the Divine presence, driven not by need but by love and union.

What we ask for may not serve our highest good

According to Meister Eckhart, God cannot always grant our requests, for we may still be in a state of unpreparedness. What we ask for may not serve our highest good, or it may simply not be the right time.

Like the soil that must first be tilled, the soul requires a practiced detachment. A receptiveness to divine gifts can only come by letting go of ego and desires. When we are prepared we receive not only what we ask for, but perceive the miracles of the very presence of God within all things. Without such preparation, we risk spoiling both the gift and the giver.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor –Speaker

If you enjoyed this article you might be interested in my latest book: Sages, Saints and Sinners

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by | February 9, 2025 · 11:31 am

Stupidity and Evil: Bonhoeffer’s Insights

“Stupidity is a more dangerous enemy of the good than malice, because malice can be exposed and prevented by the use of force, but against stupidity we are defenseless.”- Dietrich Bonhoeffer –

The German theologian and dissident Dietrich Bonhoeffer is renowned for his unwavering faith, ethical convictions, and reflections on what it means to be a Christian in times of crisis. Sentenced to death in a sham trial by the Nazis, his philosophy on stupidity and evil remains strikingly relevant today, amid the resurgence of rightwing extremism.

In the weeks leading up to his execution, Bonhoeffer deeply reflected. He considered how ordinary, decent people abandoned independent thought and passively accepted horrific evil.

Bonhoeffer was arrested by the Nazis in April 1943 and held in a Berlin prison until his execution in April 1945 only weeks before the end of World War II. During his time in prison he outlined in his Letters and Prayers from Prison, a compelling view on the moral failings of a society leading up to authoritarian rule.

It is a stark warning to developments in today’s world marked by misinformation and the erosion of democratic norms and values in Western democracies.

Stupidity is more dangerous than evil?

He argued that stupidity was even more dangerous than evil because people were blind to reason and resistant to correction. Unlike an evil person, the stupid person is unaware of his own ignorance and can easily be manipulated by dark forces. A stupid person or a person stuck in an ego personality will also never admit that they made a mistake.

The theologian observed that individuals become even more foolish when becoming part of “group-think”, especially under authoritarian regimes. When individuals surrender independent thought to a group they become incapable of critical self-reflection, making them susceptible to propaganda.

People become particularly susceptible to stupidity and evil if they surrender their moral and intellectual independence to an external authority.

To resist this, according to Bonhoeffer individuals must be liberated through self-reflection and self-work:

  • Develop a strong ethical foundation based on conscience rather than blind obedience. He warned that authoritarian regimes manipulate people by dulling their moral senses. Behavior that would never have been tolerated under normal circumstances becomes the norm.
  • As a Christian theologian, Bonhoeffer emphasized that faith in God should lead to courage and resistance against injustice. True discipleship means refusing to be complicit with evil.
  • In oppressive systems people stop thinking for themselves. Encouraging education, open dialogue, and debate can counteract this.

Developing internal and external freedom

Bonhoeffer also recognized that internal liberation needed to be aligned at the same time with external freedom. He advocated for:

  • A just society required strong institutions that upheld justice and human dignity.
  • Bonhoeffer himself took direct action against the Nazi regime, arguing that when a state becomes oppressive, Christians and moral individuals must resist, even at great personal cost.
  • Oppressive systems isolate individuals to maintain control. Bonhoeffer emphasized the importance of ethical communities that support and empower individuals to act against injustice.

Bonhoeffer deeply believed in the interconnection between internal and external freedom. A society that values fundamental democratic freedoms will create conditions where moral and intellectual independence thrive.

People who are empowered by taking personal responsibility will challenge unjust systems rather than surrender to conformity. It is a powerful argument for the role of ethics, faith, and personal responsibility in protecting democracy.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

You can watch the podcast interview with Katharine Giovanni here and also on the Youtube channel Living to BE

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by | January 21, 2025 · 10:08 am

Spiritual Resilience and Life’s Challenges

Throughout my life, I have grappled with the tension between religion and spirituality. Organized belief systems can so easily devolve into intolerance, hypocrisy, and hatred of those who look, think, or act differently. Ideology in all its forms fractures societies, breeding division and animosity.

Yet, creation thrives in diversity. God’s garden is a vibrant spectrum of colors and forms, each plant and flower enhancing the other in a harmonious beauty that can only be fully appreciated when seen in its entirety.

At its best, religion provides meaning and purpose to life. It offers solace and sanctuary during life’s most challenging moments—times of grief, loss, despair, and seemingly insurmountable obstacles.

Religion at its best and at its worst

Religion can unify communities, fostering a spirit of collective goodwill that transcends individual needs. Throughout history, faith-based inspiration has unleashed humanity’s most profound creativity in art, music, philosophy, and architecture. The masterpieces of Michelangelo, the compositions of Bach and Beethoven, and the enduring grandeur of centuries-old cathedrals and temples stand as testaments to the power of faith to inspire and elevate. At their core, all major religions share a universal message of love, compassion, kindness, and peace.

Yet, at its worst, religion has been wielded as a tool for manipulation and abuse. It has perpetuated discrimination, financial exploitation, fraud, and instilled fear and shame in innocent victims, leaving lifelong scars.

Over centuries, countless lives have been lost in wars waged over dogma, with individuals persecuted or executed for deviating from “the true gospel.” Such hypocrisy has driven millions to turn away from institutionalized and denominational religion, creating a vacuum often filled by a trash culture of alternate ideologies, political extremism, or addictions to external gratification. The consequences of this disconnection are evident in the growing epidemic of depression and spiritual emptiness.

How spirituality creates resilience against life’s challenges

Recent research highlights a significant link between spiritual belief and resilience to depression. Those who believe in a higher power are often better equipped to navigate life’s challenges, finding balance and purpose more easily than those disconnected from spiritual practice.

Experiential spirituality, unlike externally imposed beliefs, emerges as a deeply personal “knowing.” As Carl Gustav Jung famously stated when asked if he believed in God: “I don’t believe. I know.” This kind of spirituality arises intuitively, often in moments of awe—walking in nature, contemplating a masterpiece, listening to music, or engaging in creative flow.

This prompts profound questions: Is religion merely a pathway to spirituality, or is it an end in itself? Are we transitioning into a post-religious era? How can we bridge the divide between organized religion and personal spirituality to cultivate deeper, more authentic connections with the divine?

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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by | December 9, 2024 · 9:11 am

When Faith Turns Toxic: The Spiritual Journey

The rebirth of Paris’s Notre-Dame Cathedral, five years after a devastating fire, serves as a striking beacon of hope during a time marked by division, uncertainty, and fear. It is a powerful testament to what humanity can achieve when united in a shared purpose.

Europe’s great cathedrals, such as Chartres and Notre-Dame, were more than architectural marvels. They were profound expressions of faith, creativity, and communal spirit. These towering structures, built to reflect heavenly glory, continue to inspire awe and remind us of the enduring power of collective endeavor.

What unites people around a common purpose fosters trust and transcends individual interests. For millennia, religious rituals and practices have served this unifying function, binding communities to shared values, goals, and principles. Religion has also provided a framework for understanding suffering and adversity, offering solace and resilience in times of need.

Religion and the sense of belonging

As inherently social beings, humans find strength in connection. Participating in religious ceremonies has historically reinforced a sense of belonging and strengthened the social fabric of communities. Modern studies affirm this, linking faith and religious involvement to lower levels of depression and anxiety, underscoring the vital role of shared spirituality in nurturing mental and emotional well-being.

Hill and Pargament (2003) concluded that spirituality fosters resilience by enhancing hope and optimism, even in highly stressful situations.

But paradoxically the affiliation to a specific religion, community or faith often strengthens the divide between “them and us”. Religion can bring out the best and the worst in humanity. Friendships, humanity and service may be restricted to the “in group” while those outside the group were often villified and dehumanized.

In my recent podcast on LivingtoBE, I discussed with psychologist Katie Turner, on when spirituality or religion becomes toxic and in some cases cause long-lasting trauma.

  • When clergy, therapists or spiritual teachers have not done the the self-work by transmuting their own shadows they will project these on their followers.
  • Some religious beliefs discourage seeking professional help, claiming that prayer or faith alone should suffice.
  • Religion is then abused as a tool of manipulation, coercion, control and exclusion. Overemphasis on sin, punishment, or unachievable standards of moral purity can lead to chronic guilt and shame.
  • Toxic religion often revolves around charismatic leaders who demand absolute loyalty and discourage critical thinking or questioning.

When members of a religious community feel compelled to suppress their individuality, religion can even alienate them from their authentic spiritual path and soul purpose.

Religious platitudes may hinder personal growth and self-discovery, with fixed beliefs locking individuals into a singular worldview obstructing the evolution of spiritual awareness and consciousness.

What Can Help?

  • Set Boundaries: Establish clear limits on how much influence religion exerts over your life and well-being.
  • Seek Broader Perspectives: Explore spiritual practices and belief systems that prioritize love, tolerance, acceptance, and personal growth.
  • Consider Professional Support: Therapy or counseling can provide a safe space for healing from spiritual abuse or the effects of toxic religious experiences.

At its best, religion offers sanctuary, love, and compassion during times of need. At its worst, it can inflict profound physical and emotional harm. Cultivating a grounded connection to your own intuitive senses and spiritual needs will help you discern and navigate the difference, empowering you to recognize and avoid toxic expressions of faith.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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by | November 12, 2024 · 10:49 am

Bridging Religion and Spirituality

“God is at home. It is we who have gone out for a walk.” – Meister Eckart

I have always struggled with taking the teachings of the Bible literally. Once, when I voiced my doubts to a pastor, he replied, “You just have to believe.” This answer left me unsatisfied, deepening my questions and nudging me further from conventional faith. Today, I see myself more as a spiritual seeker than a believer.

After much soul-searching, including walking many pilgrimage paths in northwestern Spain, I’ve come to feel and experience something profoundly vast and mysterious, far beyond the simplified image or concept of a personal “God.”

I find it hard to reconcile the notion of an all-powerful, loving God with the existence of suffering and a deity who punishes or abandons those who disobey or fail to believe. The God of the Old Testament is often portrayed as a father figure, demanding absolute obedience to doctrines meant to provide stability, certainty, and structure. Within this framework, dissenting interpretations and questioning of these truths were rarely tolerated and brutally suppressed.

Diversity as a core principle of creation

In my time spent contemplating nature, I have come to see diversity as a core principle of creation itself. In nature, every being continuously changes, adapts, and evolves. Those that resist adaptation ultimately fade, making space for species better suited to survive. To me, this endless process of growth and refinement mirrors experiential spiritual growth, which, unlike fixed belief, is fluid. Here, understanding is shaped by direct experience, reflection, and openness to change.

Different religions, like different races, and cultures are like a garden meant to complement and enrich each other. South Africa’s Archbishop Desmond Tutu pointedly once described it as:

“God’s dream is that you and I and all of us will realize that we are family, that we are made for togetherness, for goodness, and for compassion. God’s garden is diverse, with many colors and cultures, and all are precious in His sight.”

Creating peace through mutual respect and compassion

Embracing and accepting the diversity of cultures, faiths, and perspectives as a divine gift is the essential foundation for lasting peace in our world. When we see this diversity not as a source of division but as a beautiful, intentional expression of creation, we open ourselves to mutual respect, compassion, and understanding.

Each unique tradition, belief, and background can contribute its own wisdom, enriching the broader human experience. True peace arises from recognizing that our differences are not obstacles but opportunities to grow, connect, and celebrate a shared humanity within the wholeness of creation. .

Bridging science and religion

Albert Einstein, in his efforts to bridge science and spirituality, described a “cosmic religious feeling”—a deep awe at the order, beauty, and mystery of the universe. For him, this feeling didn’t arise from belief in a personal God but from reverence for something grand and beyond human comprehension. He didn’t see God as a being who intervenes, rewards, or punishes but as a metaphor for the universe’s profound mysteries. While he respected religion’s role in human ethics, he believed morality is a human endeavor rather than a divine dictate.

Spiritual understanding, I feel, is something that grows and adapts with experience, often diverging from the intended path to reveal unexpected landscapes. Such growth may not even be a choice. Sometimes we are forced onto the path of spiritual awakening by profound loss, pain or hardship.

Fixed beliefs can offer a foundation, while experiential spirituality allows expansion, reinterpretation, and deepening of understanding. The former might be expressed in ritual, prayer, and sacrament, while the latter can be found in meditation, contemplation, deep communion with nature, or service to others. Yet, the two need not be in opposition; instead, they can enrich each other.

As the 13-century Mystic Meister Eckart once reflected: “The most powerful prayer, one well-nigh omnipotent and the worthiest of all, is the outcome of a quiet mind. The quieter it is, the more powerful, the worthier, the deeper, the more telling, and more perfect the prayer is.”

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. If you enjoyed this article you will be interested in my books available where all good books are sold.

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by | May 8, 2024 · 9:02 am

Is religion stifling spiritual growth?

During my childhood in South Africa, I started having my first doubts about religion when clergy defended from the pulpit the abhorrent policy of apartheid and prevented a devout black priest from attending a church ceremony.

The message of salvation failed to resonate in the obligatory Sunday services which I found to be extraordinarily melancholy and joyless occasions, steeped in empty ritual. It did however serve the purpose of sending me onto a path of intensive ongoing spiritual exploration.

If you are one of those people who left the church in frustration after being shamed for thinking differently or questioning doctrine, then welcome to the club.

For centuries religious institutions have stifled spiritual growth and prevented people from living their divine purpose by telling them how to behave, what to believe, and even what politicians to vote for. This, for me at least, is the ultimate sin for which the church needs to take responsibility.

Spiritual but not religious

Especially younger people in Western countries are seeing through the hypocrisy and leaving the church in droves. But does that mean that more people are becoming agnostic, atheist, or have lost their belief in the divine?

Seven out of ten Americans describe themselves as spiritual in some way including 22 percent who say they are spiritual but not religious.

Even the first Christian communities were often divided between legalistic interpretations of the Gospel and experiential spirituality. There is a lovely passage in Galatians 5 of the New Testament of the Bible where St. Paul criticizes an early church in today’s Turkey.

Paul underscores the centrality of the Gospel, calling on the faithful to practice love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control as opposed to the legalism of what foods to eat and what could and could not be done on a Sabbath.

Jesus, the ultimate revolutionary

Some 2,000 years ago Jesus broke all religious conventions by healing the sick on the Sabbath. He was eventually crucified when openly exposing the hypocrisy of the clergy, by dining with sinners, tax collectors, prostitutes, and other outcasts – who were excluded from the Temple.

Jesus never had plans to establish an institution or a church and would probably be horrified by what people are saying and practicing in his name today. When someone starts confronting me with the words: “Have you found the real Jesus?” it is for me a signal to run.

Temples, churches, and places of worship could be turned into sanctuaries of peace by opening their doors to people of all faiths. Many Christian churches however are stuck in tribalistic doctrine, especially when it comes to who is entitled to holy communion, abortion, or whether women can be ordained as priests.

Thriving churches, however, are vibrant meeting places for people joyfully dancing, singing, praying, and sharing meals together. In a positive sense, they can cement the community spirit, especially in urban environments where we have an epidemic of isolation and loneliness. These church members practice a living faith by visiting the aged, providing comfort to prison inmates, and refugees, and establishing food banks for the hungry.

Spiritual growth comes from a place of brokenness

There is a saying that religion is for those who fear hell while spirituality is for those who have been there. The seeds of spiritual growth come from a place of brokenness.

On my more than a dozen walks on the Camino in Spain I have met countless people who have gone through the hell of losing loved ones, confronted life-threatening illnesses, the dark holes of depression, financial ruin, and relationship breakdown. What I can say about all these people I’ve met on the Camino is that such life-changing events made them come out stronger, forcing them into deep introspection on the purpose and meaning of life.

A cosmic religion of the future

Experiential spirituality is a process whereby the shutters of the soul window are opened. It is a feeling of connection with the divine, and the mystery of creation. The great scientist Albert Einstein once said that the religion of the future will be cosmic in nature. 

“The most beautiful and deepest experience a man can have is the sense of the mysterious. It is the underlying principle of religion as well as all serious endeavors in art and science. He who never had this experience seems to me, if not dead, then at least blind,” Einstein is quoted as saying.

The Dalai Lama, the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism, encourages individuals to go beyond the superficial differences among religions and recognize the deeper essence of spirituality and morality that can be found in all faith traditions. 

The fundamental principles of compassion, love, and ethics are not limited to any particular religious tradition or belief system. These principles, the Dalai Lama believes, are universal.

Already early into this year, a record number of pilgrims are walking the Camino. All share the common quest that has resonated through the ages:

“From whence do I hail? Whither do I journey? What purpose guides my days ahead?”

In echoing the ancient Sages and Mystics, emphasizing the innate spirit of man: Where there is a lighthearted spirit of joy, peace, positivity, and kindness, negativity and darkness recede.

Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker

P.S. I’m excited to announce the release of my latest book, “The Turning of the Circle: Embracing Nature’s Wisdom for Purposeful Living.” If you enjoy it, you might also be interested in my previous works, “Deep Walking for Body, Mind and Soul” and “Walking on Edge: A Pilgrimage to Santiago.” You can find all of these titles at reputable bookstores near you.

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